What's next?

It's been a while since I last wrote. The last time I wrote... I was in Quepasa Land. But no... no more. As of last friday I no longer have a job. That's right. You give your life to a company for 2.5 years, and its just goodbye... Thats ok, I'm looking forward to this time off. Figuring stuff out. From my previous posts...from over a year ago.. you can see that I didn't have much time for anything. Work drained me.

Like a hamster in running and spinning around in the wheel... I worked hard for Quepasa, only that Quepasa never moved forward. The clashing cultural expectations, confusions, lack of vision strategy unfortunately led the company to the crisis it is in now.

Stories... mmm do I have them. I have quotes, stories, the ridiculous things that happened during my years there. The random people that came in and out of my life. It was unbelieveable. Sometimes its hard to even believe.

Now that I'm out of it, I question, what will I do next, what do I want... where will I go. I don't really know. Honest to God. I really don't know. Do we ever know? Or are we just passerbys and pick up opportunities that we think will be fulfilling as we move along in life?

I can't really answer that question right now... for now... I'm going to go to bed... I have to wake up and start my gym and taking care of myself routine. Through these years, I have kind of forgotten about myself... what do I want? I hope I will figure it out...

Meeting Expectations

From Family
From Friends
From Work
From Life
...and from what I want... wait what do I want? Do we ever know what we want, or when it comes we just know? mmmmm. Not sure.

We don't ever really really ever know what we want because once we achieve what we thought we wanted, we want more things. Does this make any sense at all?

Probably not. I think im tired.

Moo Lattes, fireworks, and Murals....

These last two months have been weird for me, work has been very crazy, my life has been up in the air in the sense that stability is virtually non existant for me... though its crazy life has a way of rewarding you through fun, random and spontaneous moments...

...such as spending time with someone new, and having stimulating conversations on things that really matter. Sometimes we all get so caught up in what is expected of us, that we forget to introspect, and go inside to really see how we're doing... sometimes meeting someone new, having things in common, and just spending time that is stress free and open is what we need to really start to ground ourselves and remember the things that are really important...

We all need to have a job, but to not get caught up in it and to take it for what it is- is the challenge. To not forget who we are, what our dreams are, and find that delicate balance between work and dreams is sometimes the dilema we all face...

Sometimes meeting someone who you can open up with and have good conversations with is what you need to become more aware of yourself and what you want.

Mistakes made; mistakes learned.

"Mistakes are part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way... Unless it's a fatal mistake, which at least, others can learn from..."

Everyone has a different value system. Its hard to accept sometimes....and it kind of hurts when you realize people are/were/never will be what they seem(ed). Or don't have the character sufficient to be who you thought they were...

Some things.....

At the end of the day, there are some things you just can't help but talk about. Some things we just don't want to hear, and some things we say because we can't be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they're what you do. Some things you say cause there's no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves.

A bar... in Hermosillo Mexico.

I see in front of me a couple arguing, very intensely: he said, she said. He thinks that she doesn't put enough effort into the relationship, and she thinks that she has, and that he's too demanding.... I don't think this argument is going to end anytime soon, but I hope she wins. :)

I see to the left of me, two business men discussing a sales strategy for the following day, I think they work in semi conductors or something technical like that....

I see at the front desk a customer is very upset, because she was overcharged for something, and they are not understanding.

A bartender keeps trying to ask me if I need something else, but I don't pay attention. He comes up to me, Srta Paola algo mas? I say no thanks. 5 minutes will pass and he'll be back again.

The phone rings...... someone that hasn't been able to get a hold of me thinks I'm avoiding him...
Not the case.... at all, and if he only knew what my schedule has been like.

It's 10:20 - tomorrow is another day.

Till tomorrow....

When did it happen?

That I over stay at work, that I don't have time to see the people I care about, that I feel stressed for planning a vacation? WHEN DID IT HAPPEN? This is not me.

Por el amor de dios. And its even worse when you you tell your family this and they start laughing at you, "welcome to the real world pao." grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I will still be a world traveler when I grow up.... Job requirements are: 10% work and 90% play.